Fiction has nothing on real life

 During summer break, I read a large number of books. I travel to all the used bookstores and search the New York Times best seller lists for books on a variety of subjects. Some are true, historical and right up my alley of interest and some are historical fiction. Biographies are high on my list but don't have me read self help books. Ugh. 

I just began this book so I have no idea what happens but the title drew me in and I remembered a book I had just read about Jewish children being sent to England during WWII to keep; them safe. I thought at the time, what a horrible decision to have to make, especially knowing you might never see your children again.

This one is different. It is the story of 2 little girls whose father died in the war and mother met at new man. New man was abusive toward the 2 girls because they were not his. (Sound familiar) Girls' journey takes place right after World War II but it is one that is nothing new.

I was blessed with having two parents who made sure my life was relatively safe. I never had to worry about food, or shelter or love of family. Although my son did not have his father in his life, I tried to provide him with the same. 

The number of children in foster care or adoption situations in the United States today is huge. As of 2019, according to childwelfare.gov is 423.997. There were approximately 120,000 of these children who were available for adoption. Many of these are placed due to neglect, abuse or abandonment, much like the little girls in the book.

There have always been placement services for children in this country. Many times family placed children in orphanages because they could not care for them. If the situation changed, they would go and get their children back. Many of these places were not nice places, and there seems to never be enough homes for them. There have been abusive boyfriends and too many women who believe they need a man in the home to survive. How many times do we read in the news where another child has been killed by a boyfriend who was babysitting while mom worked? This list is extensive. 

I hear students discussing their home life sometimes and I wonder how these kids will ever survive in the world today. The emotional and mental abuse, the drug use, the nasty, mean boyfriends. The list is long. For many of these children, and they are still children, school is their safe place. They may struggle to keep up with schoolwork because they are responsible for their younger siblings and have become the adult when the adults in the home are never there. They may not have technology. Their parent may stay out all night so the child is never told to turn off the light and go to sleep like I was. 

In some cases, they may be treated like a friend to the parents. They may share beers or a joint. Social services isn't called because no one knows for sure. Then they must report to school in the am, try to study and absorb what the teachers are trying to do and it is not easy.

Many have a very distorted view of the world, and wonder why they just don't quit, get a job, and get out of where the situation for them is not the best. They have no positives in their lives and doubt they will have any the rest of their lives. Some have learning difficulties due to parental drug use or wear the same thing day after day because they only have one or two things to wear. 

I believe all my students can succeed. Even with the strikes that life has thrown their way. I think we must learn not to use our personal situation to judge whether our students are being the best they can be. In many cases, we have no idea what these students must face in a day in, a day out situation at home.

One of the things I do know is that fiction has nothing on real life. The problem is the blinders that so many wear when dealing with our students. The truth is the blinders don't negate the problems, just hide them for a while.